You Will Shoot Your Eye Out

TEXAS — The recent issue of unidentified drones hovering over American skies was solved suddenly today after the drones attempted to fly over Texas.

Within seconds of the drones entering the Lone Star State, the sound of heavy gunfire split the air as Texans pumped thousands of rounds of ammunition into the sky.

“Yee-haw!” shouted local man Dean Billings, grinning as he blasted drones with his neighbor. “Been waiting for this day to come forever. Feel like I’ve died and gone to heaven. Oh man, here comes some more, Bill!