A Victory! Allies

Carjacker Kills Himself With Shotgun As He Attempts To Break Window By Tom Knighton

Carjacker Kills Himself With Shotgun As He Attempts To Break Window

Carjackings have to be terrifying for the victims. You’re sitting there, minding your own business, when all of a sudden an armed individual shows up and steals your car out of nowhere. The sudden, terrifying nature of such an attack has got to rattle you.


However, carjackers aren’t necessarily a particularly bright bunch. After all, it doesn’t take a master criminal to stick a gun in someone’s face and take their car. This isn’t Gone In 60 Seconds we’re talking about here.

No, it’s a violent assault on an individual with the potential for the shedding of innocent blood.

Which is why it’s absolutely hilarious when the problem sort of takes care of itself.

A carjacker died after he accidentally blasted himself in the chest while trying to smash a window with the butt of his shotgun, an inquest has heard.

Officers investigating the death of Reece Ramsey-Johnson said they were satisfied there was ‘no third party involvement’ as they closed the probe into his killing.

Witnesses who saw the 22-year-old dying from gunshot wounds in the street outside a Lloyds bank in Sydenham on Sunday, September 8, said his own gun may have gone off when he used to to hit a car window.

Opening the inquest at Southwark Coroner’s Court on Thursday September 26, Dr Andrew Harris confirmed the police investigation had now ended.

He said: ‘The investigating officer is satisfied there is no third party involvement.

Now, this was a UK carjacker and not the American variety of the breed, but it’s still the feel-good story of the day, that’s for sure.

It also suggests that British gun control laws aren’t nearly as effective as some want to claim them to be. After all, if someone like this snotnosed punk could get a shotgun, they can’t be all that hard to obtain on the black market that I’ve been assured doesn’t really exist in the UK.


To be sure, Ramsey-Johnson got precisely what he deserved, regardless of where he was located. Such criminals should always meet such ends. At least here in the United States, we can arrange for them to meet those ends. In the UK, you have to hope and pray it’s someone of Ramsey-Johnson’s…intellect. That’s what it takes to make sure predatory jackwagons get precisely what they deserve.

Honestly, though, I’m actually a bit baffled at just how stupid you have to be to shoot yourself in the chest while trying to bust a car window. I get that they don’t have the gun culture we do, but it shouldn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that you don’t point your gun at yourself while you smash the firearm against a window. This is especially true if there’s something like a finger on the trigger.

At this point, Ramsey-Johnson’s death isn’t just a feel-good story, but a prime example of nature adding a little chlorine into the gene pool. My only hope is that this jackwagon hadn’t already reproduced and thus spread his idiocy to a whole new generation.

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